It's all Gray

I back to my daily routine, back to counting calories.  I have not lost or gained any weight since my last post.  I am stuck in the middle.  Part of this has been the heat...it kept me inside when I should have been out.  But I'm tired of being stuck, so the workout routine is back...don't give up on me please!

Well...it has been a while, we had a little roller coaster with my grandmother there for a few weeks, but I am glad to say that she is home and getting stronger every day.

The Docs said she should have gone into a nursing home for a short while for some rehab because she would need 24 hr care.  That just wasn't Shirl's style! So home she came, and for the first week we are all taking turns and spending time with her.    She is getting stronger every day, and this morning was already saying she would like to go up north!

I have always believed that everything happens for a reason, even at a time like this.  It was a definite  eye opener, and has also brought our family together more.  I have always loved my aunts, but during this have gotten to spend more time with them and get to know them.     My family is amazing, and strong, and I love them all.

The bad news in all of this is that my routine has been neglected over the past 2-3 weeks so I have only lost 2.7 more pounds.   The good news however is that 98 percent of that time, I was still counting calories, and have not gained weight!  

This morning I rode my bike to Grandma's house and let me tell ya...I'd been used to riding my bike EVERY DAY, and after 2 weeks of not riding, I was a huffing and a puffing up those little inclines.  the good news is that on the ride home I barely had to pedal at all!!

Keep me in your thoughts!  I'm still in this for the long haul!!

So last thursday my grandmother had a heart attack.  She has been in the hospital since then, they did a cardiac cath to check for damage, and it wasn't too bad...so she got away with just a small procedure instead of surgery.  Then her hemoglobin dropped, so this morning, or late last night actually they had to give her a blood transfusion.  The docs don't know yet why she is losing blood or where the heck it is going...so they did a scope today and found nothing.  More scopes tomorrow.

Needless to say it has been a rough few days...or week I guess.

And lets just say setting in a hospital waiting rroom every day for at least 8 hours doesn't burn a ton of calories.  In fact I have not lost any weight this past week, I also have not gained any weight back.  Sticking to salads and light snacks, lots of water and the occasional pudding from the cafeteria to stay on track, but I just haven't been up to working out when I get home.  

Hopefully Shirl the girl (my gran) will be home safe and healthy soon!  And I can get back on my bike!!

22.4 pounds lost, and hopefully never to be found again.  I was hoping to meet the 25 mark before I posted but yesterday was my cousin's college grad party...needless to say I splurged. However, I am still very proud of my 22.4 pound loss. 

I am upset however, that it isn't able to be seen as much as I thought it would be, my mom and Jason say it looks like I am losing, but when I look in the mirror I see no difference.   I can tell in my clothes though, as I am pulling out last years summer clothes, things that were tight last year, are now very baggy.  I guess when you have as much extra weight on you as I do, 25 pounds isn't as much of a dramatic loss.

Trust and believe that as soon as it is a noticeable weight loss I will have pictures up, I am just not there yet...but I will be soon.

And again thank you to everyone that reads this and sends me little notes of encouragement!! 

so it was toasty today, and I haven't spent a moment not moving.  I have either been doing laundry, or on the stationary bike, or doing zumba.
the couch doesn't get much action anymore~!!  i parked the stationary  bike in the middle of the living room, it might look tacky, but it keeps me moving...if i am reading or watching tv, i am on that bike!
oh by the way...
zumba almost killed me, my dog decided to stand behind me while i was attempting to zumba, and since he only weighs 3 pounds i decided not to step on him and almost broke my neck.
too tired for grammar and spelling...
I am very proud of the fact that I haven't given up yet, and I feel great...
thanks to you all for all of your support, and remember to tune in on monday when I share my numbers!!
love you all!!

...Will be happening next week!!  LOL

I have used the Freecycle group on yahoo many times to get rid of things I didn't want/have room for.  The other day for the first time, I decided to put an ad up with a request.  I asked if anyone had any fitness stuff gathering dust, and to my surprise, because of that ad I know have a stationary bike and a gazelle!

I don't know where I am going to find room for them now ( because I didn't think anyone would reply) so as of now the stationary bike is in the living room, so when I watch tv,  I won't just be setting on my butt!  We haven't picked the gazelle up yet, it might have to spend some time in the garage until I find a place for it!

I'm so excited!!!

I almost fainted in the frozen food section of my grocery store today.  Now that I have changed my diet and actually read nutrition information...I am shocked at the calories that I used to consume.
Jason and I would buy the frozen make at home chinese food all of the time, today in the store I read the label and almost hit the floor.  One bag of mandarin chicken, (that we used to split in half) has 230 calories per serving..not including sauce....and it said there were 8 servings in the bag.  WHAT???

We used to split the bag and have rice and carrots with it...and an egg roll too....

Needless to say, I will not be consuming that again any time soon...

Tonights menu, chicken sausage with corn and rice.

I am doing well on the 1600 calories per day, and according to the labels, when we did make at home chinese food I was consuming that many calories in one meal.

My legs feel like they are going to fall off.  Jason and I did a ten mile bike ride today, there were times I didn't think I would be able to do it, but I did.  We did take a small water break every 2.5 miles, but we made it.  I was worried Jason wouldn't be able to finish, because his back has been acting up, but he proved me wrong.  

So, I was feeling good today, so while Jason was at PT I decided to go off on a bike ride.  So off I went with my ipod tucked into my bra.  It was chilly but nice, and then about 45 minutes into it , the rain started.  :(

              So, we realized that we needed a new lawn mower, and before we decided to buy a new one, I hit craigslist hard in search of a deal.  I did end up finding a deal, but not for a mower.  I found an ad that read "used book sale!!  fill any box you bring for two bucks"
              Jason, knowing me far too well, began his search for the biggest box we could find.  So we headed off to bay city, and pulled into the parking lot for the creepiest building I've ever seen.  The inside of this place looked like it hadn't been touched in 25 years and everything looked dated and dusty, excluding  the bottom two shelves of ever aisle.  I went buck wild, apparently this guy hits every library sale he can find and stocks up.  I was in hog heaven, we really had to look because there was NO system at all to the way they were plopped on the shelf, and as stated they were on the bottom two shelves, and in boxes stacked in the corner.  We filled our box to the top, 50 books easy probably more we didn't actually count.  After forking over a whopping two dollars, we realized the big box theory was cost effective, but didn't transfer so well.
After some grunting and groaning we finally got the box in the back of the jeep and headed to sam's club to stock up on my fat free yogurt , and a new shiny self propelled lawn mower.
              As I said in my earlier post, I am thrilled to be back in my own house so I can get back on track.  I've also decided that starting tomorrow I will begin a food journal, each day I am going to document every calorie that passes over my lips.  I hope this will help keep me on track!  I am going to try to do a 1500 calories a day.
             Once again, I want to thank you all for checking in on me. This is not just a diet, it is a lifestyle change, and it is going to be a hard one, but I know that I can do it with your support!!

Being away from my treadmill this week killed me.  And the nasty storms didn't help at all, they just kept me inside.

I can't wait to get back to my own house and get back into my routine!!

Well, we had a fantastic Easter weekend, but today I am sick as a dog.  I think my stomach is upset with me LOL
It's going to be a tough week, we are house setting for my mom while she is out of town, so I am going to be without my treadmill all week!!!
I'll keep you posted!  Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Last Friday, in the middle of everything else that was happening, Jason's mom gave us each a chocolate bunny.  We tried to explain that we were eating healthy and she could give them to Karmen's (his brother's girlfriend) kids.  She insisted we take them.
Jason's bunny is no threat to him.  One of his new medications he takes for his back injury basically knocks his appetite away.  ( NOT FAIR)  My bunny on the other hand, had been calling to me all weekend, and yesterday I answered his call. I slowly  opened the brightly colored box, and when the seal was broken the aroma of chocolate took me away to a place, a marvelous place where for a few seconds, there was no guilt related to my  weakness.
It only lasted a few seconds, as I bit a chunk of cocoa flavored goodness from that poor still bunny, I chewed it up and swallowed my guilt...and realized that chocolate had tasted very good, but nothing in comparison to the feeling I have after a good workout.

With that, I removed the ear less bunny from his beautiful container and tossed he and the box in the garbage can separately to prevent any second thoughts and cravings for more temptation.

I guess the point of this is to admit that yesterday I had a moment of weakness and consumed some cocoa flavored bunny ears, but I overcame temptation, and removed it.  I would not have been able to do that if I hadn't received so many encouraging messages from all of you!

So thank you all so very much! I'm going to finish up some laundry, and then hit the treadmill!

Ok, so Wednesday, during my mega workouts, Jason called me and said he was feeling like he was getting shocked.  He said it was starting at his waist and moving up to under his arm.  Since he had just done the RFA treatment to his back (they burn off the nerves around his micro spinal fractures to prevent pain) we called the Dr that did the treatment.  He said this was for sure not normal and to come in friday. Thursday and Friday, the shocking feeling was happening more often, and he also started to get tremors in his legs.  He described the feeling as "my leg is vibrating" this was happening and sometimes lasting 5 minutes, sometime 3 hours. On top of this, his pain form the procedure, which had been getting better, was now increasing to the point of him becoming restless.

So friday we FINALLY got down to see Dr Fridel, he says to ice, start motrin 800 , and contact Dr Emmer (neurologist) ASAP, because this reaction is not related to the procedure, and we would need to get some imaging done to figure out what was going on.   Meanwhile, we leave a message for Dr Emmer, and head to the in laws because it is his mom's birthday.

Dr Emmer finally calls back and says go to the ER.  Of course we put this off until after Joan's birthday festivities.  We get to the ER at ten ish, see a Dr around 2ish, finally gets a CT scan at around 4ish, and the ER doc basically tells us he has no idea what is going on, but juices Jason up with a nice little coctail of 2 pain and one muscle relax injections, and sends us on our way at 620am saying "contact your neurologist"

On the bright side, Jason was finally able to get some sleep when we got home.

Phew what an ordeal. So now we wait until the 29th to see Dr Emmer, so hopefully he can explain/eliminate the discomfort Jason is having.

Long story short, I did not work out on friday at all, but I wouldn't have been able to anyway, because on thursday, I got on the treadmill and after 25 minutes, realized it wasn't a treadmill day.  Then i did My zumba workout, and by mid afternoon every muscle in my body was hating me.  Diet wise I am still going good, however i did break down last night at the ER and bought a real Mt Dew so I wouldn't pass out after being up so long!

Phew, sorry for the long post!  I'm off to do laundry, and zumba! I only slept for 3 hours, but I don't want to sleep all day and goof up my sleep schedule, I do however, plan on letting Jason hibernate as long as he can because he hasn't slept in days due to his back!

Take care all, as always thanks again for your support during all of this!

oh my oh my, so I happened to call my husband while I was out and about with leann today after our workout, and when I called he was in the middle of buying me another workout game for the wii that I had been talking about.  I was thankful and surprised, but actually had him switch it out (since he was still in the store) for the zumba dance game for the wii....

Let me tell you what a fantastic workout that game gives you, we ( Leann and myself) tried out the beginner 20 minute work out and it was awesome.  It really gets ya movin and groovin.

I am just so excited that I am still sticking with this, and so thankful for all of your support. Please keep checking up on me!!

Whew, got up early this morning to do my treadmill workout  so that I would be done with it before Leann comes over.  We are going to dance our buts off, and I also had Jason air up our bikes so we can go for a bike ride too!!

I just sent an application email in to A&E to be on their show "HEAVY"
I watched an episode and cried my eyes out.  I want to do this, and I hope hope hope they chose me.

It was nice to be away and with family over the weekend and for jason's birthday, but it felt great to get home and be able to get back into my routine.  As a fat girl, I never thought that I would enjoy working out, but I do.
so it's back to water, fat free yogurt and all kinds of veggies and fruit.
I am also considering cutting back on white flour as much as I can...not all together, but it won't hurt to switch in whole grains every once in a while :)

I have decided that I want to attend an adult fat camp...
so if any of you are rich, and would like to fork over four grand, that would be cool~!!
hey...a girl can dream can't she?

I feel awful, today was Jason's birthday party at my mother's house...and I ate far too much, there were chips and dip and cake and ice cream, things I hadn't had for weeks. The worst was real soda, I hadn't had it in ages, and today did not have the will power to avoid it.

On the bright side, tomorrow after taking the dogs to the vet, we are headed home to the treadmill and the wii, so I can get back to work.  My father died at the age of 51, I refuse to follow in his footsteps, I am 29 and will not allow my life to be that short.

I appreciate all of the support I have been getting from my friends, and I hope that it will keep coming.

So I think that I need to change my just dance workout from tough to intense because it's only wednesday and I have already meet my weekly goal!
YAY!

Didn't make it home until after 5 today, the upside to being gone with jason all day is that he drives so I managed to get an entire book read today.  After playing with the dogs who always greet us so sweetly when we com back from a long day I headed straight to the living room and did my just dance workout.  I actually did three extra songs after i had met my goal according to the game.
I Love the way I feel after a 45 minute work out.
The downside to us being gone all day on the road from appt to appt, was that we had to do lunch on the road which isn't diet friendly, but we stayed away from fast food, so I don't feel too bad about it.

So  my goal for day one is met, treadmill time is over, I kept it at a quick paced walk at 4mph for ten minutes , with alternating intervals of run (8mph) for 2 minutes and jog (6mph) for 2 minutes.  So it was walk -jog-walk-run-walk-jog and so on for 45 minutes.  It worked great for me for now, and I felt great when I was finished, maybe in a week or two I will increase my run and jog times.
I couldn't believe how much my legs and arms burned by the time i was done...oh yes I was working those arms like crazy the entire time.

Time for lunch, and then some just dance 2 on the wii.

I'm sick of having more chins than a chinese phone book, so keep your fingers crossed that I stick with this!!

So this weekend went very well, we made a trip to saginaw and purchased the just dance 2 game for the wii.

I had never played this before so I had no idea what to expect.  I was happy to see that on the menu, they have a just sweat option, which is has three different work out plans, and tracks your daily and weekly goals.  Let me tell you it was the second most fun I've had that made me sweat!  Both Saturday and Sunday I met my daily goals, and let me tell you by the end of 5 or 6 songs, you can feel it all over your body, and it felt like my arms were going to fall off....

Well, I'm off to have oatmeal and oj before I get my dance on, and when hubby wakes up, I need to have him get some of his junk out of the spare room so I don't break my neck trying to get to the treadmill...

I can do eating healthy, but that alone isn't enough.  I gave up pop, started drinking water instead, occasionally I will have a diet cola, but honestly that is so much better than when i used to drink almost a twelve pack a day. Long ago I had given up sugar cereals and traded them in for raisin bran and oatmeal.  I traded potato chips for carrots and bananas. My weakness however is dairy.  My friend abbey gave up dairy long ago and she looks beautiful .I confess now that i will never be able to give up dairy, in my mind a few ounces of cheese is better than a little debbie, that is my story and I'm sticking to it.

So the eating healthy I have, I can do fruit and veggies and avoid fatty foods, but unless I am moving my but to exercise eating healthy won't help.
Why is it so hard to get on my treadmill?
Sometimes I think I should move it into the living room instead of having it in the spare room, maybe if I couldn't avoid looking at it everyday the guilt would build up inside me and I would actually use the thing more than once a week...

My Friend is the one who inspired me to do this, and she said starting Monday she is going  to do weigh ins....I am not strong enough to do that, I mean the people in my life know that I am fat, but i don't think they need to know the exact numbers.

So instead I say this, starting Monday i am going to start using my treadmill AT LEAST one hour three days a week.  and on the non treadmill days...it is warm enough that I can walk or bike along the trail they have here in town. Also I am thinking about buying one of those dance games for the wii, when I was younger I used to dance like a fool, maybe I need to start doing that again :)

Her name is Amanda Hocking, and since I found one of her books for my kindle a few weeks ago, I have read 8 of her books.  I just love her work, especially her my blood approves series.  If you have a kindle, or an amazon.com account, go buy her books.  My next step is to get them in paperback too, yes they are that good!

I hate Grocery shopping! How hard is it to pass up the oreos and goodies when your cart is full of yogurt, fruit, and carrot sticks?  It's my own fault i know, I should have gotten my weight under control long long ago.  The truth is however, I always blamed my weight on being unhappy and single.  So four years ago when I met my now husband, things should have changed.  Now I am a happy fat girl, which makes wanting to lose weight even harder, because he loves me no matter what.
There is no excuse, I have a perfectly good brand new treadmill in our spare bedroom doing nothing but collecting dust, and a beautiful bike in the garage just waiting for this michigan weather to warm up so we can go for a ride.
I even have a playlist on my ipod entitled workout...all I need now is the motivation to do something.
There is no excuse anymore, warm weather is coming, and so is a smaller pant size!

Thankfully working out will not hinder my other obsession, reading.  My kindle can lay right on the dash of the treadmill so I can read while I waddle :)  I don't know what I would do without my kindle, as if I wasn't addicted to amazon.com enough already right?